It’s Tuesday, which means it’s one of my days off. I will have to do a little bit of work later, but I’ll do it from my sofa and it will only take up a small part of my day.
As I have mentioned previously I have a bit of an unorthodox work schedule and work almost every weekend of the year. Well, this past weekend was a rare one without work and it actually could not have fallen at a better time… because my girl Roxy (my dog) is sick.
She’s got a hacking cough and although she’s in good spirits, I can tell she doesn’t feel well. Sunday night my mother and I took her to the ER and she’s now being treated for Kennel Cough with antibiotics. I’m still freaking out though because if she doesn’t start feeling better by today or tomorrow I will have to take her for x-rays to rule out more serious ailments such as heart failure or pneumonia. I am praying she feels better soon. I think I can see her improving, but I am still so worried. She’s old – 13 years – which means anything can turn serious quickly. It is all making her mortality so real which is instantly upsetting for me. I already know that we’ve had more time together than we have left and it makes my heart ache so. I’ve posted my Roxy story which some of you may have read, so you already know what she means to me. She’s my life-saver, and my best friend.
Last night she was having a bit of a coughing fit and seemed to calm down when I was with her and petting her. So what option did I have but to sleep on the floor with her?
I don’t have children (the human kind), so those of you that do may think it’s absolutely insane, or insulting, or just weird that so many pet parents think of their pets as their kids. The entire concept puts some people in a tizzy. However, I’ve had Roxy longer than most of my friend’s have had their children. I feed her, I take her to the vet, I worry about her, I keep her alive and safe and loved. I’m very aware that it’s different, but I will never have children so for me that’s what she is. I comfort her when she’s sick, and she does the same for me.
Dogs and pets in general become our family members. We love them like they’ve always been there. We can’t remember life before them, and we can’t imagine life after they leave us. I mentioned to a friend once that it just isn’t fair that they don’t stay with us longer and she replied, “Nope. Dogs are pure joy, and God only allows us this pure joy for a limited time.” It’s like that saying: happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length. Dogs are so very good and loyal. They are too good for us and we don’t deserve them. I don’t know if dogs go to heaven, but I hope they do.
Yesterday, I was digging around the house looking for something and in an old book I found a picture of my first dog, Max, as a puppy. I got him for my 7th birthday and he passed when I was 19 years old. Almost half of my life ago. Again, my heart ached. Max is an entirely different story, but I loved him so much – the same way I love my Roxy Heart (named after Roxie Hart).
Why do they touch our lives the way they do? I think it’s because they are so loyal. Roxy has never cared if I was skinny or fat, sad or happy, had short or or long hair, sick or healthy… She’s just always there no matter what. She comforts me when I’m not feeling well. She’s a gentle sweet girl and I don’t take her companionship for granted.
All that said, I know if she doesn’t improve then there could be something seriously wrong with her. I’m praying she gets better soon. She is so resilient, as it seems dogs just are. I wish she could just tell me what she’s feeling because right now I feel so helpless.
If you are the praying type I ask for prayers, and not just for Roxy, but for me as well. I will worry myself sick until she’s better. My mom always reminds me not to worry until there’s something to worry about, but that’s so difficult to apply when it’s my best friend. So again, please send us all of the love, prayers, hugs and good vibes you can. I will be forever grateful.
Puppies are so very special and I sometimes get nostalgic for Puppy Roxy. She was so ridiculously adorable, insanely hyper and I lost so many shoes and handbags and power cords to her teething phase (soooo many shoes). But a senior dog is so special. The love they give is unparalleled.
I hope my girl knows how much I love her. I hope she knows that she’s the best girl in the world, and I hope she thinks the same about me.